UK Lockdown: Day 239

Day 39 does not seem 200 days ago. I remember that day really well, I bumped into an old colleague/friend whilst we were out for our daily walk- I say bumped, crossed paths with from a distance is more apt given the circumstances.

It’s stuck in my mind quite a lot because I was wondering how her life had changed (I knew she’d lost her job- I’d left a few months before they company closed down), and what she was doing with herself. For some reason I didn’t ask her, social etiquette didn’t allow for it perhaps, Covid left only one subject to discuss maybe, or maybe simply because she might have sugar-coated her new career and that could have been too much for me to hear.

The trouble with many of us is we hide so much of what we are feeling, and show a false image of ourselves online and even in our reality lives’ to depict that everything is going swimmingly when it really isn’t, why do we do that? I’m an overly honest person, but I’m kind of happy about it, because being able to say how I’m really feeling is one of the only things that keeps me sane. In fact, when I don’t talk about how I’m feeling I end up really struggling, and that is not the way I want to live my life.

I suppose, the point to this rant is simple really, we all need to be more honest and transparent about how we are really feeling, and be fair to ourselves about our own mental states. Mental health is such an important part of your overall health, yet it is seemingly ignored by so many of us. Lockdown has made a lot of people I know ignore how they are feeling, and it’s mounted to the point where they now need to admit to themselves how much they need support.

Please don’t suffer alone. Admit to yourself if you need help. Speak to someone you can trust. Find the right support. Don’t lie to yourself or hurt yourself any more.

Today has been a strange one, I spent my morning applying for a variety of new roles and opportunities, refreshing my CV and hoping for a new tart career wise. Possibly the worst time I could be doing it, but I don’t really have a choice, so here goes!

This afternoon we headed out for our daily walk and treated ourselves to a hot chocolate. We got a leaflet from Costa through our door which was a Buy One Get One Free offer on festive drinks, which is definitely why we decided to get one. Basically, it’s Costas fault if I buy loads of hot drinks from them this season…

Another treat to ourselves was a homemade brunch for dinner. Clearly we like to live dangerously. (At least by our standards of excitement).

What do you do to make yourself feel a bit better on those strange days?

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